The Future's Bright The Future's...

A combined public municipal building housing the local council offices, the public library, the registry office and god knows what else, probably a swimming pool and a health spa sponsored by Preparation-H.

My sister in-law recently went down to her local library with her daughter to find that it had been closed down, seemingly without any fore-warning. My sister in-law stated that this must be because ‘only my children and I are ever here.’ This closure of libraries is happening up and down the whole nation and why the media has been all wrapped up in the phone-hacking scandal the future of the library has been discussed behind open but ignored doors. So what could the future be?

One idea put forward by the local government association and the MLA (the museums, libraries and archives council) is that the libraries could shared there space with the council offices, police stations, NHS surgeries, local museums, health spars and sports centres. All based in one large, possibly purpose built, super hub. The centre of community, all things to all people, and no doubt in their minds, the minds of the LGA and the MLA, it would be somewhere that would be full of light and life, clean, well kept and well funded. I would just like to ask where is all the money going to come from to fund these ‘Super centres’? To look and any of Leeds’s council offices or police stations it is easy to see that there is no room in the existing buildings in the centre, even the library is running out of space. So where, pray tell, would these centres be? There is of course another problem with this idea. Exactly how local will these ‘Local’ centres be? My sister in-law for instance lives a good twenty minute drive outside of the city centre, is she really going to frequent this super hub. Thats twenty minutes in clear traffic by the way, a rare thing. SO how local is local? If this idea can save the large city centre libraries what is the hope for the smaller local libraries?

Another idea for these smaller libraries is it trying to get them to remain open through some sort of corporate sponsorship, either by local, national or international businesses. No, it is the wonderful mobile library. The small collection of books that travel just for you to find that they have no books of use or turn up a different times on different days every week. Is this really the answer? Or is it now that the true idea of society, not the big society of the Conservative party but the local community, to step forward?I have a fairly large collection of books and it is people like myself who may just save the idea of the local library. If the libraries are closing what is happening to their stock? Who will inherit those well loved and thumbed books that have a smell that takes me back to my childhood? Well if there is some kind hearted individual with space and an inclination could they not take on the role as the village or small town librarian. Is the future of the small town/village library a small town philanthropist? Is the future a house full of books using library thing as a reference system? (www.librarything.com) Is this what the small public library will look like?

Is this its new front door?

(All be it on its side.)

And I am not saying this should be done for free, surely if the libraries are closing a payment of say £20,000 a year would not be to much to pay someone to keep this facility available? Maybe it could be arranged by appointment as well, like booking a table at a restaurant, well no ones house is that big and the person must be allowed to take time to go to get shopping etc... I am not saying that this idea is perfect but you know what, it might just work.

THAT IS ALL.

And now, as is now the tradition. Todays recipe.

Broad Bean Balls.

Shell about a kilo of broad beans, blanch for about thirty seconds in boiling water and then take off the skins. In a food processor (its the easiest way) blend a good handful of coriander, two chilies (more if you want them hot, less if you want them mild) salt and pepper and the broad beans. add a little flour until the mix if fairly stiff, add some roughly chopped spring onions (about two for some crunch). make the mix into small balls and deep fry for about a minute or until the outside is dark brown then place on some kitchen towel to drain off any excess oil and serve hot with mint yogurt dip, or treat them just like falafel's.

Enjoy, I am off to watch the Sweeney, The Sweeney, ba ba ba ba ba ba baaaaaa
you slag!

Throw Them Out

Last night, after a delightful meal at the local Japanese restaurant and the winning of a pub quiz, I came home switched on the TV and was confronted with the despicable, derisible and disgusting face of Piers Morgan on the American celebrity apprentice. This show, on the BBC at the moment runs the same format a the British celebrity apprentice. The shame that this individual brings upon the nation is massive, how can this man still be allowed to represent Britain on the international stage? In the episode last night (01/08/2011) he started a spying war with the opposite team, after this all went tits up members on both teams and even Donald Trump used the term ‘British’ as an insult but when Morgan used the term ‘Very fat Italian’ towards a member of his team there were shouts that this was a racial slur. Surely if one is a racial slur then the other is as well but no one jumps to the defense of the use of the term ‘British’ and as it is used towards Piers Morgan in a way I can’t blame them but how did the term British become an acceptable insult? It probably because of people just like Morgan and the other celebrity representatives like him. Can’t we take away his and the others citizenship? There is also some speculation that Morgan will be dragged into the current newspaper hacking scandal from his time at the Daily Mirror and surely this can’t be to bad a thing, thats if it does happen, as then we can have a reason to pass him onto another nation. Wanker!

In other news the USA is seeming to come to some sort of agreement about its current debt crisis, although what that agreement will be nobody seems to be to sure. In the UK and in todays press there are call for Britain not to fall into the same kind of clutches as the USA and its most wonderful Tea Party. The Tea Party is calling for ‘no taxation’, this is based in a country with some of the lowest taxes in the world, with no true social welfare system and a large gap between rich and poor. This from a country that used to have to the motto, out of many, one. A country that allows the rich to get richer while having no requirement to look after the little people of their own nation. So the motto of the original Boston Tea Party ‘No Taxation without Representation’ seems to be turned on its head, taxation without representation, thats if you are poor of course. In America the idea of philanthropy is one way in which the rich and super-rich can make meaningful donations towards the state and towards charity.Often at public galas, which can’t but help there public image.

In the UK there is the idea of the BIG SOCIETY, an idea brought about by the governments and David Cameron's blue sky thinker Steve Hilton. A man much lambasted in Charlie Brookers Guardian column on monday (01/08/2011) Is this an attempt to push the American style of public Philanthropy on a small scale? Who really has that much spare time, especially in a year which sees thousands of charities receiving funding cuts from the government and thats not even mentioning the cuts in the arts sector and the cuts in education and the increasing of tuition fees. So how can I, a student, in almost full time employment, home owner and aspiring something or other really give anytime or money to anything. Those with spare time mostly have money and as the rich pay tax, apart from Phillip Green who avoided a massive tax bill by moving his assets into his wife's name (and others like him) why should they become involved as they already put large sums of money into the economy through the aforementioned taxation? One possible answer is to start to hunt down the unpaid and avoided tax bills of the rich, avoidance of tax, even through legitimate loop holes surely is a failing of the state and the systems which nurture them in there younger years. A tax bill of £300 billion or thereabouts and thats not even including the fines. £300 Billion, thats a lot of income into the economy which could be invested in schools, industry and anything else which needs a bit of a fix. Well we shall see what happens in the USA, maybe by the time I publish this it might be well on its way to being decided and as for us in the UK well we will just have to wait and see.

THAT IS ALL.

And now for TODAYS RECIPE.

Lets see, mmmmmmmm, I’m going to go for Baked smoked Haddock.
First prepare a mix of eggs (3) a little dash of cream, a dash of milk salt and pepper, whisk until a smooth well mixed liquid. Boil a few new potatoes until just about cooked, chop and add to a ceramic dish, say about 10 centimetres across and about 5 cm deep. add a few chopped spring onions and some flaked smoked haddock, top up the dish with the egg mixture and sprinkle with paprika and black pepper. Place in the oven at about 180c for roughly 20 mins or until the bake has a quiche like quality. Serve with salad and a nice glass of dry white, maybe a sauvignon blanc, but make it a good one and eat outside in the sun.

See you Later.

They Don't call them hacks for nothing.

As someone who has considered a future in journalism (although my spelling and grammar will need a lot of work) it comes a no surprise to me that the hacking scandal is now spreading to other papers apart from the News of the World. This has now been going on, for what seems like, time immemorial. Will it ever end? How did anyone not think that the NOWT (i understand that this is acceptable) were using underhand tactics is beyond me, it is, sorry was, full of trash, stories that no one would really like to admit to and most of it definitely would not come under the heading of news. It has long been a fact that tabloids as well as the broadsheets would pay rewards for stories, probably bribes for leads and have had a close relationship with the fuzz (or police if you will), all to help with circulation numbers. Toady a man won a settlement to be paid compensation by eight newspapers because of the reports that he was a murderer, a line feed to the papers by the Bristol police, and the number of papers is also expected to increase. This seems to be just another sign of irresponsible reporting by some of the national papers.

At the head of the hacking scandal is what i consider to be the lowest of the low papers (apart from the Sunday sport (a newspaper?)). Although I know people who read it I must always ask myself why. This dirt is now spreading to papers such as the Daily Mirror with the most hated figure of Piers Morgan rearing his head. Could this be a witch hunt for some of the most hated men in the mass media? Well if it is i can’t blame them. So why did the NOWT and, supposedly, other papers use such underhand tactics and why O why did the NOWT hack the phones of the victims of the 9/11 tragedy? The answer dear friend is readership. These kind of stories sell the paper, these stories are what you want to read. Aren’t they? Well I can only really answer for myself, in which case the answer is no. I really don’t care about many of these stories that came from the hacking scandal, the only story I care about is the hacking scandal, exposed wonderfully by some pure investigative journalism by the guardian. The stories that came from phone hacking are much the same as the stories that were covered by the recent ‘super injunction’ fiasco. Stories about who is sleeping with who and so on and so forth, then again I suppose this is exactly the kind of place that the gutter press should be in.

So what is the answer? Greater regulation? An independent board much like OFCOM? I don’t think so. These kind of solutions in many ways will challenge the freedom of the press, self regulation then seems to be the way forward, self regulation with an enforced greater transparency. Tell us at least how information was gathered, trawling through bins, interviews, paid informants, whatever, just tell us and tell us that it is legal even if it is a bit underhand.

And now it has been announced that the police, and soon I guess the FBI, are launching a new investigation into the computer hacking that has allegedly been taking place and all to bring us the ground breaking stories of who is sleeping with who. With that kind of in-depth investigative Journalism I am surprised GRAZIA hasn't been frayed into this whole episode.

Just one more thing, it has been announced today (friday the 29/07/2011) that as of next year the BBC will no longer be the main holder of the F1 rights in the UK and that sky will now be showing every race live and the BBC will only have every other race. This I think is a real shame and a little of a strange decision on the part of the F1 rights holder. Why would you change a sport that relies on viewer numbers for the sponsorship etc to a pay channel and whats worse one that has adverts, I mean adverts in the middle of a race how stupid. I hope that this decision gets over turned by FOTA as it seems to me that this is in breech of the concord agreement between the F1 teams and the FIA and Bernie Ecclestone. Wankers!!!!!

THAT IS ALL.

and now, you lucky sods, TODAYS RECIPE.

Hot Spicy Asian Broth.

Create a stock base with chicken bones, half an onion, two mushrooms, salt and pepper a stalk of celery and a hand full of kaffir lime leaves. Bring to the boil and simmer for roughly twenty minutes then add dried chilli flakes, a really large pinch, and simmer for a further five minutes. Pass through muslin and keep the stock. Fry onion and garlic with 3 fresh chilli's, when the onions are caramelised add enough stock for a bowl of soup, and reheat, strain the stock and discard the onion etc and add cooked noodles to the stock ( in a bowl) add some sliced spring onion and a few drops of sesame oil to garnish. To make a mightier soup you could add some nice shredded lemon chicken.

The ???? are coming

First things first i must state that my heart goes out to all in Norway. A tragedy perpetrated by one man with loss to the whole nation and now this one man states he has ties with the British right wing. That this lone crusader has ties with others within Europe seems a real worry but what exactly are these defenders of British and indeed European culture defending? Lets focus on Britain as that is what i know best.

I have always thought that in many ways Britain was much like Japan, a strong cultural identity, a sense of self, they have the samurai we have the red coat, they have an emperor, we have a queen. Both are small island state that exist on the edge of a continent but are in many way separate. Unlike the japanese though Britain and the British have lost there sense of self, our singular culture and it is this that the far right wing are trying to protect. Or are they and have we really lost our sense of self or are we just not willing, in all ways, to open our eyes to what British culture really is?

In Germany Merkel once stated that multi-culturalism wasn't working well maybe thats true but how about plain old simple culturalism? And what exactly is this cultural that these naive, thuggish 'protectors of the west' are claiming to protect?We the people of Britain, English, Scot, welsh and Irish we are all the same aren't we? We all where kilts with bowler hats and eat lava bread don't we? No of course we don't so even at the simplest level we are already a multi-cultural society and does anyone pretend that getting to that was simple. Britain was once as diverse in culture and language as the the whole continent. Once. Now we are more or less unified or are we?

Unlike japan Britain has no single unified ethnic group, we have Saxon, Norman, Pict, Scandinavian, Roman and lord knows what else all blended in a big sperm mixer, but what of the new Britain, the one we inherited from the victorians, what kind of sperm in that mixer?

Britain was once the largest muslim empire the world has ever seen, that is the largest number of muslims under one flag and that flag was the union jack. So surely that religion is part of our culture and should be celebrated. We once shared our empire with hindu, buddhist, muslim, taoist, coptic christian, catholic, pagan, black, white, african, indian, chinese and all kinds of race, religion and creed. This is our culture, in this country we should consider ourselves people of the world. All these religions, cultures have influenced our land. Curry is as british as fish and chips and that fish is probably influenced by jewish food stuffs. What could be better than if we just worked a little harder at accepting what Britain is rather than what a few right wing idiots tell us it should be. What they tell us is stupid and what makes these 'lone wolfs' act is even more stupid. A fear of people? A fear of difference?

After all difference is what makes a country whole, working to overcome the differences and celebrating those differences make all of us stronger.

So whatever those lone idiots might claim the are defending the only thing they are really proving is their own stupidity, their own closed mindlessness and this doesn't only go for groups like the BNP and the EDL but also the groups from the other corners of Britain's diverse culture, accept what we are and what we have, sure the world isn't perfect but why don't we attempt to make this glorious Albion as close to perfect as we can.

THAT IS ALL.

The geisha photo is with kind permission of itsumo japan. a great blog about japan and its culture, which i like. find it at itsumojapan.blogspot.com

And now for TODAYS RECIPE.

Slow Cooked Lamb

preheat the oven to about 180ish in a large deep roasting dish place a good sized lamb leg, 3 onions peeled and quarter, 5 carrots roughly chopped, 3 sicks of celery roughly chopped, 5 large potatoes quartered, two lamb stock cubes (or a pint of home made lamb stock if you have it) and two bottles of a nice white wine, dry is best. place in the oven for at least two hours if not two and a half, a nice long cook. serve at the table, the lamb should fall off of the bone and the veg should be soft, provide plenty of fresh bread to dip in the sauce. Enjoy.

Once again of you like this post or any of the others please like on Facebook and repost on your wall, thats on facebook or twitter (using the buttons below) this will help me increase my readership.

Look out for my podcast coming soon.

There they go again

So it has been a while hasn't it. I have been away and now I am back and something has got my goat. First let's look at a video

Is there anything you notice? Well they all have an accent and they are all men and there lies the problem.

This well known establishment has the most sexist policy I have ever heard of. It has long been a agreed fact within the world of catering that a mans position is behind the bar or on the front desk and the ladies are on the floor serving tables. This might seem sexist but it most defiantly has a practical side more heavy lifting is involved in bar work not to mention the shifting of barrels and women generally have a nicer temperament to wait on tables apart from that god knows why it is always a male maitre'd in all the movies. These distinctions are all blurred in the modern world of catering. Or so I thought......

This wonder of deco design and italian style is akin to one of Berlusconi's bangs bangs parties. The current Italian prime minister is well known for his attitude to the fairer sex. I didn't think that this extended to the whole nation but guess I should have known better.

it seems that inside this restaurant male chauvinism is alive and well. Two friends of mine have worked in this location, both attractive females and both fully capable at any job a restaurant might throw at you. One of my friends was told she was to ugly to work there, well not told to her face she overheard two of the managers talking loudly in italian a language that she happens to be close to fluent in. The other lady, after working seventy hour weeks at a well known hotel chain, got told that she was too short to work on reception, could only run food to table (to be seen but not heard) and at most could only possibly handle working a maximum of a twenty five hour week, this was of course because she was of the lesser, weaker, stupider sex.

How can it be that in this modern world a place such as this exists? How can this happen? Well it seems that the world of catering is the forgotten profession. No private health care and no options for pensions, fifteen hour shifts with one break, sexist managers and staff, low wages, breaking the law at many levels and what worse? The fact that this industry is glamorised by the media but is not investigated for approaches such as this, or the employment of chefs from abroad so wages can be lower, that's rather close to slave labour for my liking. I am not saying that all restaurants and establishments are run in this way it just seems that a lot have this hidden behind the scenes and I haven't even mentioned the bullying that chefs seem to get away with to the extent that it is accepted on tv and seen as entertainment.

So what can we do? Well first of just don't go to this restaurant, support independents that are on the small scale, in the Leeds area think reliance, rivers meet in ls26 or just anywhere that seems to be nice, the food is not that good at bibi's anyway, last time I ate there the steak tartar tasted like fish. THAT IS ALL.

And now for a new feature that I am going to call TODAY'S RECIPE catchy eh, and as a treat today you will get two.

Broad bean anti- pasti

Shell and cook the beans in boiling salted water for five minutes then rinse with cold water and peel.
Chop a good handful of basil, a large handful, and crush and chop 3 cloves of garlic. Mix the beans, basil and garlic in a bowl with olive oil, just enough to cover the beans, add three drops of Tabasco ( or more if you like it spicy) salt and pepper to taste and a tiny splash of either cider or White wine vinegar. Stir all in together and put in the fridge to chill. Works well as a cold accompaniment to chicken or warm summer salads, great with cheese and on a ploughmans.

Quick tomato salsa.

Quarter as many tomatoes as you wish ( cherry or small vine tomatoes are best) finely chop shallots or sweet red onions, mix in a bowl with a good glug of olive oil and a good glug of White wine vinegar, salt and pepper to taste, but the salt is important it will draw the liquid out of the tomatoes and provide more flavour. Leave this mix to sit in the fridge for a while. Just add tobacco to make it spicy.

And the award goes to....

And the award goes to.

So another day another dollar, or in the correct parlance, another pound. So what could get to me today you wonder! Well I tell you, it's this countries appetite for celebrity stories. Why O why do I give a crap if a certain footballer ( I understand an injunction is still in place) sleeps with some bit of nonsense off of a shitty channel four poop hole of a program. I know this comes kind of late in the day for such a rant but still it is shocking. What is so special about these people that they should be hounded? Where does 'in the public interest' come in? Yes the 'public' maybe interested but is this information important? Is it really in the interest of the public? Is this information for the public good? What difference does It make to my life if a kicker of inflated pigs bladders goes sleeping around? I would more like to kick his inflated ego until it's a bloody pulp!

         I'm not saying that I agree with so called super injunctions, not if they get in the way of of something that the public has a right to know. Something like a corruption case involving public officials or public funds but if these injunctions protect a private citizen's rights to a bit of peace and quiet while they try to sort things out then that is a worthy purpose surely. How would you feel if the local rag reported on how many number twos you do in one day. (2)

        In the case of this well published case of the urine bag kicker and a Miss something or other it is reported that the injunction was taken out to avoid blackmail. If that was the case why not file a charge of blackmail? The case would not have been allowed to be reported on and the press would have still been gagged but following a correct and fair procedure. 

        The real reason behind this recent farce is the publics unending need to know all the ins and outs of any semi-famous persons ins and outs. In the case of the footballer it is not as if he choose the limelight, football is what he is good at, it is not his fault that football happens to be the nations favourite sport, even though we are pretty bad at it. If I am good at accountancy ( which I am not) would it be my fault to enter that profession? All I am saying that being a celebrity because of being good at something is not the same as being a celebrity for being a celebrity i.e Jordan or someone else of that ilk. These people need the investigation into their private life in much the same way as I require food to live, without it they will die the torrid death of the forgotten and their natural home is inside the pages of tabloids, the home of the terrible, dull, unintelligent and needy. 

So just remember that footballers are footballers and accounts are accounts. They are not role models they do not choose to be stared at and interrogated by plebs who feel they have a right to judge, they just do what they do. If you really are interested in the lives of the famous then read tabloids and read the stories placed by the managers of the 'celebrity celebrity' let them have the limelight they crave and keep all this kind of chatter out of my view. 


THAT IS All.

Big British Castle

The Big British Castle

So the first thing is.... Thank the lord for the BBC the way TV was meant to be. O’ and some of the radio stations aren’t bad either. The problem with Tv is the fact that there are so many god damn adverts and yes you could say that some of these adverts are more intelligent than the programs that they are interrupting and maybe thats the crux of the problem. It may not be so much the quantity of the adverts but the quality. After a morning discussion with an old friend it came to my mind that some of my greatest Tv moments have been adverts, but also some of my worst. How many times do I need to be told that DFS has a sale on, I mean after all you are the Discount Furniture Store after all. How many times at 3 O’clock in the morning, watching some ridiculous program on some ridiculous channel, do I need to be told about the Dolphin Bath lift, seriously it would be better to advertise a machine that could lift my final glass of absinthe to my lips to help obliterate the shame that these kind of adverts puts on my soul.

So it seems that the best adverts can leave a lasting memory. who remembers the secret lemonade drinker of the R Whites adverts (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLBi06j8pjc) or the smash robots, the OXO family, gravy with a smattering of cheese. There is a good mix of these on you tube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dc-Bk11xWug) and for you young’ens that can’t remember that far back heres another selection http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAMwriy2OAI . There not all great but you get the idea. At the moment we probably all have a favorite advert and there is nothing wrong with that but what I’m asking is that can’t the Advertising Standards Agency have a bit more of a standard? Can’t we impose some kind of minimum spend to stop such awful adverts appearing on Tv? And please please please can we shoot meerkats?

I understand that advertising is what funds most Tv stations but can’t we think of something better? Or even just better adverts? Isn’t advertising where soaps come from and I understand that some people even watch those out of choice! So we come full circle to the BBC a haven of commercial escapism even if it’s just to flick to while other channels show the market traders. So once again God Bless The BBC.

And unlike the murphy’s I am Bitter

THAT IS ALL.

sheesh

As I sit in a Byronic pose, smoking fine dark Turkish tobacco, dressed in the national costume of Albania (jeans, t-shirt, stubble and a smoking hat) I happen to see waiting at the public transport halting area the bane/banes of my life. CHILDREN. Loud, noisy, snotty nosed, ill mannered children, O‘ and whats this next to the children is the degenerated, swamp like, primordial ooze ejecting, hell hole of human DNA that is the parents.

Now not all children are to be disliked, just as not all parent discharge such (to borrow a phrase) sexcrement. Is child bearing a right or should it be a privilege? In a world where the population is expected to grow at a rate which will see us overrun and out-sourced within a matter of decades, is it right that the pits of humanity are allowed to continue breeding? Is it right that in an age of austerity that those with no money, no job, no prospects and no education are allowed to take money out of the pockets of those with such things? And is it fair that those with no children should pay for those with?

For this is more a case of outrage at the self sustaining state supported continuation of these breeding packs, those of five generations of pushchairs with only 40 decades between them. What checks and balances could be put in place to halt such an onslaught?

Question one:

Holding up several different items of clothing, ask which is appropriate clothing for everyday wear, if they point at a track suit and the person being questioned is a man continue to ask “Where are the pockets?” If he points to the waistband and where his underwear would be....... Chop off his cock.

This is just an idea, i am sure all of you could come up with questions, maybe if we all submitted our questions to the department in charge of such tests the first question should be “how many questions are there?” If they can’t count to such a number.... Off with his cock, or tie up those ovaries ( in the same way as “bring on the wall”). These people would then be given the chance to improve themselves, self financed, and allowed to retake the test when they see fit, if they pass then they may progress to the privilege of state supported child bearing, with all the perks that it brings.

As I said this is all just an idea at one way to fix this ‘Broken Britain’, halt global warming,

reinvigorate the economy and free up space and pacify my Bus.